"The Bus' Hangs Up an Out-of-Service Sign Blah Blah Blah Blah

Hooray! Yipeee! Bettis is retiring! (sound of crickets and frogs). Thank God I don't have to watch anymore people swing from his cojones. I have had enough of the cheesy "Bus has made his final stop" jokes and watered-down metaphors. Didn't they teach us in J-school to refrain from using cliches? I am sick of the cutaways to his parents in the stands, who if you hadn't heard, have never missed a game. Dude, what parents wouldn't want to go to every one of their son's NFL games? I sure as heck would'nt miss one. Oh, and how sweet an ending....Bettis won his Super Bowl ring in his hometown of Detriot and Cower finally wins his first title blah blah blah.

Fact is, it wasn't pretty. They didn't play like Super Bowl champs especially Roethlisberger. Maybe they should have just played wide receiver Antwaan Randle El at QB the whole game after he threw an amazing touchdown pass which was much more graceful than anything Roethlisberger produced. And don't even get me started about his touchdown which was clearly, not a touchdown.

So everyone, even God, seemed to be on the Steelers side. Everyone wanted that fairy tale ending, for Cower, Bettis and the 23-year old QB. Everyone wanted to start a new Steeler dynasty. Everyone including the referees. The officiating was atrocious and, trust me, I am never one to ‘cry referee’ after a game as to why a team lost. And I am still not using it as an excuse. Clearly, the Seahawks didn’t bring their A-game, but every time they did get up somehow, the referees took it away, so the ’Hawks could never capitalize.

The Steelers and the nation got their fairy tail ending along with their budding dynasty. Mike Bianchi of the Orlando Sentinel summed it up in his column. “This is how this story should have ended. Any other way would not have been right. Any other conclusion would have been like “It’s a Wonderful Life” ending with George Bailey actually jumping off the bridge and drowning. We wanted the Pittsburgh Steelers holding up that trophy. We needed the Pittsburgh Steelers holding up that trophy. If the Seattle Seahawks had won, it would have been the stuff of dull documentaries. The Steelers winning was the stuff of fantastic fairy tails.” Aww…how poetic. Speak for yourself Mr. Bianchi. I guess you never tire of predictable Hollywood chick-flick endings, but I do. Hopefully, we will see you in a sequel next Super Bowl and you can shove your fairy tail ending up your blah blah blah…