Broken News! Liberals Are Banning Christmas!
In last year's election, the Republican's sent brochures to evangelical's in the country stating that the liberals were going to ban the bible. And now Fox News, I mean, the right-wing are at it again. Unfortunately for them, this story on every network except Fox, has become, well, rather humorous.
It makes me think of a line from one of my favorite movies, Happy Gilmore. Y'know, when Happy is talking about the special jacket you take home after winning a tournament. "Gold jacket, green jacket who gives a s*&%," Happy says. Well I say, "Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, who gives a s$#@." I just don't understand how people are offended by saying "Happy Holidays". Like Christ would get mad or something! First off, I have always used the term Happy Holidays. For one, you can kill two, possibly three birds (holidays) with one stone. You've got Thanksgiving, Christmas, Hanukkah, and New Years. So, using the term "Happy Holidays" can actually save you a bunch of time in this short life. Secondly, I reside in Hollywood where I am a rare Christian specimen. So, rather than have to decipher if I am talking to a Jewish person or a Christian, saying "Happy Holidays" saves time again, and it is just more politically correct. But since this democracy is evolving into a theocracy that term is not okay in the eyes of the powerful right-wing and if I am overheard I will probably be sent to a US torcher chamber in Africa.
The hypocrisy of it all is even more amusing. Boy's and men alike have always told me how Valentine's Day is really just a holiday-for-profit. Sounds a lot like Christmas these days. A materialized billion dollar industry where people riot in Wal-Mart to snatch the latest Tickle-Me Elmo. These crazys are offended that Target is saying Happy Holidays instead of Merry Christmas. Are you kidding me? If you are so "holy" and "Godly" what are you even doing shopping? Shouldn't you be helping the less fortunate in soup kitchens or ringing the Salvation Army Bell outside Target to help others, like Jesus would be doing?
So ask yourself these questions if you are offended by the term "Happy Holidays"-
1. WWJS- Where Would Jesus Shop? Only in places that use the term "Merry Christmas?
2. WWJR- Where Would Jesus Riot (for Christmas)? Wal-Mart? Target? Best Buy?
3. Would you throw out your White House Christmas Card that failed to say "Merry Christmas" and instead stated, "Wishing you a Happy Holiday season..."? Gosh, how insensitive of them.
4. Did you know your second prophet, Bill O'Reilly, well his Christmas cards also failed to say Merry Christmas even though he was one saying that liberals were banning Christmas!? Did you order one of his "Holiday Ornaments".
It makes me think of a line from one of my favorite movies, Happy Gilmore. Y'know, when Happy is talking about the special jacket you take home after winning a tournament. "Gold jacket, green jacket who gives a s*&%," Happy says. Well I say, "Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, who gives a s$#@." I just don't understand how people are offended by saying "Happy Holidays". Like Christ would get mad or something! First off, I have always used the term Happy Holidays. For one, you can kill two, possibly three birds (holidays) with one stone. You've got Thanksgiving, Christmas, Hanukkah, and New Years. So, using the term "Happy Holidays" can actually save you a bunch of time in this short life. Secondly, I reside in Hollywood where I am a rare Christian specimen. So, rather than have to decipher if I am talking to a Jewish person or a Christian, saying "Happy Holidays" saves time again, and it is just more politically correct. But since this democracy is evolving into a theocracy that term is not okay in the eyes of the powerful right-wing and if I am overheard I will probably be sent to a US torcher chamber in Africa.
The hypocrisy of it all is even more amusing. Boy's and men alike have always told me how Valentine's Day is really just a holiday-for-profit. Sounds a lot like Christmas these days. A materialized billion dollar industry where people riot in Wal-Mart to snatch the latest Tickle-Me Elmo. These crazys are offended that Target is saying Happy Holidays instead of Merry Christmas. Are you kidding me? If you are so "holy" and "Godly" what are you even doing shopping? Shouldn't you be helping the less fortunate in soup kitchens or ringing the Salvation Army Bell outside Target to help others, like Jesus would be doing?
So ask yourself these questions if you are offended by the term "Happy Holidays"-
1. WWJS- Where Would Jesus Shop? Only in places that use the term "Merry Christmas?
2. WWJR- Where Would Jesus Riot (for Christmas)? Wal-Mart? Target? Best Buy?
3. Would you throw out your White House Christmas Card that failed to say "Merry Christmas" and instead stated, "Wishing you a Happy Holiday season..."? Gosh, how insensitive of them.
4. Did you know your second prophet, Bill O'Reilly, well his Christmas cards also failed to say Merry Christmas even though he was one saying that liberals were banning Christmas!? Did you order one of his "Holiday Ornaments".
posted by Riley at 6:24 PM
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